My bags are packed, where to first? - Tom Szczerbowski-US PRESSWIRE
Now that you're saving millions, here's how you can buy back my love.
Confession: I'm on the short list of people NOT excited about the lockout ending. Don't get me wrong, I miss hockey like you wouldn't believe, but I just don't have the time in my life right now to love it like I normally do.
And - I feel like if I'm not getting a full 82, it's just not worth it to have an asterisk season.
That being said, I don't think it would hurt you to soothe my wounds here. Give me a little something in return to make me feel like you give a rat's ass that there is a possibility that you may have lost me forever. In other words, you CAN buy my love. Here's how:
Item #1 - All Expense Paid Tour of All 30 Arenas
I've got a bucket list, it's not original, but I want to see all 30 barns. So, Anaheim, you're taking me with you next season. I'll be at the airport waiting to board the plane with the team. You'll have my hotel room set up for me and, of course, I'll have no problems joining you for all of those amazing dinners and team bonding events. I'll be the ultimate roadie, at your expense. Oh, and make all of those reservations for two. My bestie is just as wounded as I am and could use the consoling as well.
Item #2 - Help in the Garden
Next, I just bought a house. It needs some yard work and I need some muscle to get the job done. I hear you've got about 20 or so guys who could always use some conditioning. Send them over - I'll keep them busy.
Item #3 - Season Tickets on the House
Finally, and this isn't all that ridiculous - but if you want me back that bad, you'll ensure to keep me there. I placed a call to my season seat rep on Saturday afternoon and left a message, "how can I cancel my season seats?". See, I've realized it's time for me to spend my money elsewhere.
I love being at church, the Honda Center, every chance I get. Seeing hockey live is like no other. But, right now, I'm feeling a little less than generous towards YOUR cause. I'd really rather spend the money on something that could use a little more of my own attention, like my closet and shoe rack. So, if you want me there, put me there. I'll take your tickets, no problem, but I'm just as greedy as you are, and I'll take my money, too.