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10 Mostly (Un)True Facts About Corey Perry

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No, you're thinking of the support group. This is THE BLUE MAN GROUP.
No, you're thinking of the support group. This is THE BLUE MAN GROUP.


JEN:

Sunday's game against the Blues is part of "Corey Perry Night" at Honda Center. Fans will be able to take pictures with the Hart and Richard trophies and leave the arena with commemorative pucks and posters of the dreamy Perry. In honor of all that our boy Perry has done, I've compiled a list of "10 Mostly (Un)True Facts About Corey Perry". Enjoy!

10. The Ducks lost in the first round of the playoffs on purpose. Perry is a member of Seal Team 6. (Now you know why they didn't release the name of Seals - a Canadian killed Bin Laden.)

9. Each time Perry runs over a goaltender, he absorbs a part of the goalie's soul.

8. Corey is still mad at Pavel Datsyuk for ruining his chances at the Lady Byng.

7. Perry wanted to participate in the Ducks sushi rolling contest, but his hands kept bringing the fish back to life.

6. The whiskers from Perry's flesh-colored beard are considered currency in London, Ontario

5. Steven Stamkos didn't have a scoring drought last season. Perry told Stamkos he's "gonna get it", and Stamkos waited for it to arrive.

4. Ryan Getzlaf isn't losing his hair. Corey Perry has been pulling Getzy's hairs out one-by-one since the draft.

3. Per his contract, Perry will only shower post game in the sweat of Teemu Selanne

2. Keith Richards style, Perry snorted the ashes of Maurice "Rocket" Richard before his epic scoring streak at the end of last season.

1. Every time Perry and winning the Hart are mentioned in the same sentence, a douchebag gets his lifted truck.