The Time Has Come To Say Goodbye

You rat bastard.

After what you did to me this week – hell, what you’ve been doing to me FOR WEEKS…I can’t take it anymore.

That’s it! We’re DONE! I can’t keep going on like this. I’m so tired of the way you string me along. You get my hopes up and my emotions on a high…and then, BAM! Crash and burn just like all of the other times.

I keep waiting for you to change. To find a way to move on and put these major issues you’ve been having behind you. But no such luck.

On and on it goes. Day after day, two day break after two week break. I can’t take it anymore. It’s not fair to me. I’m better than this. I deserve more than this. Sure, I’m just one of the millions in your life, but I’m not the only one who feels betrayed, trampled on, disgraced.

What kills me is that you’ve done this to others before. I’m not the only one. And yet, for some crazy reason, I thought it would never happen to me.

But here I am. Head in my hands wondering how I let myself become so vulnerable. Sure, you’re like - incredible. When you’re on your game, you’re the best I’ve ever experienced. I feel amazing when I’m embraced in your cold arms.

But this, this…rejection and this pure and utter lack of respect for my heart, emotions and devotions to you and your craft, it’s appalling. It’s disrespectful and disgraceful. I’m the fool for thinking that it would “never happen to me”. But somehow, here I am.

So……..I’m leaving you. I’m moving on. I’ll probably be single for a while to give myself time to get my head straight. To figure things out and see what I really want for myself. I may even move on to something else. I can’t make a promise to you, heaven’s knows, you’ve trampled over every word you’ve given to me.

I hope you can get your act together, but I want you to take the time to do it right. Don’t try to force yourself into recovery because you’ll always have that silly little asterisk next to your name, and that’s just as bad, or worse, than having a big X next to your title. No one will respect you either way, so you might as well just stop while you’re ahead.

I just wished you had figured your crap out sooner. There would have been no reason to have this talk forcing me to question our relationship. But it is what it is.

We’re sooooooooooo over (-Rachel Green).

Although…my self-esteem is pretty low, I might come crawling back to you next October.