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Make Us Whole Series: Screw You! Pay Me!

The NHL forced a black hole into the end of 2012. It's time to pony up and pay the fans for a wasted first half of the season.

All the way to the record books baby!
All the way to the record books baby!
Doug Pensinger

I've had to endure the ridiculous negotiating tactics of a misguided league that was more focused on beating Donald Fehr than negotiating a collective bargaining agreement. As a result, it's only right that the league make it up to me withe some well earned fringe benefits.

Item #1 - Free Center Ice

I think it goes without saying that fans should get a major discount on the Center Ice packages for this half season. This is even more important for fans who no longer live in their favorite team's market. Since the league has made it harder to see our teams, either on national or local television by canceling games, then the league should make it up to us with some free games. I need to be able to see my Ducks, so give me some free Center Ice.

Item #2 - Selanne Points Count Twice

Teemu Selanne is 61 points away from taking over sole possession of 14th place on the all time point list and 32 goals away from passing Mark Messier and taking over 7th on the all time goal list. The man scored 26 goals and 66 points last year. both of those marks were real possibilities with a full 82 game schedule. Since it's your fault he can't play all 82, I think the league should make it up to me as a fan by letting my favorite player's points count twice. It'll average out for a full season, so it's not really tainting the records. Besides, Teemu deserves it.

Item #3 - Day with the Cup

Yeah, I said it. I'm approaching 2 decades of hockey joy in my life. I've had to sit through more lost games in the past eight years than fans of other sports have had to endure in a life time. Fans know the value of the Cup. It's the most sacred trophy in all of sports.

I won't do anything uncouth. But, I'm going to take that thing to work, then maybe a movie. I might cuddle it in bed like it was a Teddy Bear. I don't know.

What I do know, is that the league should let me have a day with the Cup as compensation for making suffer through it's idiotic approach to CBA negotiations.

I WANT THE CUP!

I WANT THE CUP!

I WANT THE CUP!