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Hand Shake Line: Anaheim Calling Congratulates The Red Wings, Soon-To-Be-Retired SK Is First

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We continue the Anaheim Calling playoff tradition of saying nice things to and about the team that just eliminated the Ducks from post-season play.

Jeff Gross

[Ed. Note: We'll be running these posts throughout today. And our soon-to-be-retired SK (sniff) is first. Sarcasm is high and we try to be sincere, but yeah, you know, it's not easy to do after your heart has been ripped from your chest. - Jen]

Jimmy Howard - You are the stand alone reason the Red Wings are moving forward in this series. You shut-down and completely invaded and manipulated the brain of an $8 million dollar man point-blank. Sorry to say - I don't believe anyone is slumping in the next round for ya. I'm sure the Blackhawks are much smarter and better in getting to big fat rebounds, so be weary of that. They'll probably take a page out of the Red Wings' notebook. Hell, they did a great job in capitalizing on Jonas Hiller's fat-ass second chances!

Pavel Datsyuk and Henrik Zetterburg - Even though you weren't scoring early on, you were always a threat. My hate towards the both of you is out of pure respect. In your free time, maybe you can come show some of our players the fine art of throwing the puck to the net.

Justin Abdelkader - Congratulations, you've earned the right to be passionately hated in Anaheim, I'm sure you understand. I'm not just talking about much warranted suspensions and short-handed goals - but really, I don't think you need any other reasons. I've always appreciated the opportunity to add more to the list of reasons why I don't like the Red Wings, so thank you, for adding another notch to the ever growing list.

Detroit - PS, good riddance. Enjoy the Eastern Conference, you won't be missed. Oh, right, this is supposed to be positive...Since, according to ONE person, you're not a spotlight team, congratulations on making it into the Eastern Conference where the Red Wings' name and brand of hockey can grow and flourish the way no one ever thought it possibly could. You really deserve it. (jerks)