Anaheim Ducks Weekly Rankings March 17th-March 23rd: Sweet Elixir of Life

For those that have missed this segment, this is a weekly series on Anaheim Calling to take a look at how various players on the team have fared. I will arbitrarily rank a random topic along on a scale of 1 to 5 stars and place different Ducks within the categories based on their performance over the past week.

My reasoning for the rating of the Ducks will be based on stats, results, and probably some of my bias. My reasoning for the rating of the random topic will be completely biased #dealwithit. I will elaborate more on some players than others. I expect everyone to probably disagree with me on both topics and all of my takes will be outed. If there is something you would like me to rank please feel free to leave it in the comments. On to the fun!

The games included in the ratings for this week are Mar 18th against the Devils, Mar 21st against the Flames, and Mar 22nd against the Jets.

I have been fairly sick this weekend so I thew out the call on twitter for an easy ranking topic and @DariusOtero came in clutch with Sodas. As I have gotten older, I have tried to cut back on my consumption of this sweet, sweet elixir, but every once in a while I will indulge. I will not be ranking diet sodas in this ranking. Real soda or GTFO. Like past weeks, these rankings are 100% correct, and no one can tell me otherwise.

5 Stars: Dr. Pepper/Mr. Pibb

Dr. Pepper and Mr. Pibb are without a doubt the best soda. No other explanation necessary.

John Gibson - Gibson posted a 2.03 GSAA along with a .943 sv% and a shutout. Gibson was the main reason why the Ducks even got a point out of Winnipeg and was also brilliant against the Flames. He is the only Duck this week that was as good as Dr. Pepper/Mr. Pibb.

4 Stars: Mountain Dew

#DOTHEDEW

Rickard Rakell - Ryan Getzlaf - Corey Perry - “Scorin’, is what they got, They said remember that, Scorin’, is what they got, They said remember that, Scorin’, is what they got, They said remember that, Scorin’, is what they got, They said remember that” (To the tune of What I Got by Sublime). These three combined for 7 points on the week, but two of the three were right around or below 50% in CF%, SCF%, and HDCF%. Now I will give Perry and Rakell a slight break because for one of the three games they had Derek Grant as their center, but you still would like to see them step up in Getzlaf’s absence. Essentially the Jets game made me realize we are all Princess Leia saying “Help us Ryan Getzlaf, you are our only hope”.

Hampus Lindholm - Marcus Pettersson - These two were paired together for the Flames game and part of the Jets game and were fairly successful relative to their teammates. They were the only D pair above 50% in CF% and SCF%, which is impressive when you realize how badly the Ducks were outshot in 2 of the 3 games this week. On top of this Lindholm and Pettersson combined for 5 points on the week.

3 Stars: Coca-Cola & Root Beer

These two sodas are right in the middle of the soda spectrum. Under the right circumstance they can taste amazing, and under the wrong one taste awful.

Nick Ritchie - Adam Henrique - Ondrej Kase - This line was not great this week, but relative to their teammates they were not terrible. Kase was above 50% in CF%, SCF%, and HDCF%, while Ritchie and Henrique were below 50% in all three categories.

2 Stars: Sprite/7-UP

Sprite and 7-Up are basically the same thing so they share the 2 star rating. This soda is not absolutely awful, but I would never go out of my way to choose it. The only times I really will drink it is when I have an upset stomach. No clue if it actually helps, but it is something I have been told that helps.

Cam Fowler - Brandon Montour - Fowler and Montour as a D pair hit a bit of a speed bump this week. Both of them were significantly under 50% in both CF% and SCF% and were right around 50% in HDCF%. This pair was one of the best at suppressing shots and generating shots. I am hoping this week may have been an outlier, but they will need to bounce back in the upcoming week.

1 Star: Pepsi

Pepsi is gross and will never live up to the superior Cola that is Coca Cola.

Korbinian Holzer - Francois Beauchemin - Holzer on the week was at 18% CF%, 24% SCF%, and 25% HDCF%. I am a fan of Hozler’s personality, but these stats are truly terrible. Beauchemin was better than Holzer but not by a huge margin. He was at 39.75 CF%, 46% SCF%, and 26% HDCF%. They were without a doubt as bad as Pepsi this week.

Andrew Cogliano - Ryan Kesler - Jakob Silfverberg - This line was straight up terrible this week. All three players were significantly under 40% in CF%, SCF%, and HDCF%. If this line is this badly outshot the rest of the season it is going to be really hard for the Ducks win games.

Chris Kelly - Derek Grant - Jason Chimera - The old 4th line was bad this past week like every week since Kelly and Chimera came into the lineup. #FreeJTBrown and #FreeKevinRoy.

Unranked: La Croix

La Croix is a delicious substitute for all those soda lovers out there that is completely healthy.

Josh Manson (1 Game Played), Antoine Vermette (1 Game Played)

*All skater stats are from Naturalstattrick unless stated otherwise. All goalie stats are from Corsica unless stated otherwise